A glimpse into the life of a foster carer
- RebeccaS752
- Oct 9
- 7 min read
We're incredibly excited to launch our new series "a Glimpse into the life of a Parallel Parents Foster Carer"

I recently had the pleasure of sitting down with Veronica and David to talk about their life as foster carers with Parallel Parents. The couple have been an invaluable part of the Parallel Parents family since August 2009. In the sixteen years since, they have truly opened their hearts and their home to a remarkable 35 children, supporting young people through every stage from 3 to 15 years old.
I was eager to learn what prompted them to take this life-changing step to become foster carers in the first place, and what the journey has been like for them over this nearly two-decade-long commitment.
Keep reading to discover their unique motivations, the biggest lessons they've learned, and the special moments that have made their journey so rewarding.
So why did Veronica and David decide to foster?
Celebrating their 25th wedding anniversary in Africa, Veronica and David were captivated by the diverse local cultures. However, they were also aware of a major difference from the UK: the lack of a right to free schooling and education.
On the flight home, David was moved to action, suggesting they sponsor a child to ensure access to education. This initial act of charity quickly broadened his perspective. He reasoned that if they could help a child abroad, they should also look for ways to help children in their own community. Since Veronica had brought up the idea of fostering a few months prior, the couple discussed fostering and decided to move forward with inquiring about becoming foster carers.
Why did they choose Parallel Parents?
Veronica and David had some friends who lived locally to them who were foster carers for Parallel Parents. Veronica had seen many children come and go over the years and saw what a difference they were making to these children. Veronica had become friendly with the Parallel Parents Stoke team and saw how much support they provided and how caring they were. So, Veronica chose to inquire with Parallel Parents first to find out more about fostering and how they could become foster carers.
Veronica and David met with Parallel Parents and they felt so welcome, they were given lots of information about fostering and didn't feel pressured to make their decision hastily. Veronica and David explored all their options, to ensure this was the right step for them, as they understood that this was going to be a big commitment if they were to proceed with fostering.
Veronica and David decided that fostering was for them and so decided that Parallel Parents was the agency for them.
What has Veronica and David’s fostering journey looked like?
Over the years, Veronica and David have provided various types of care, from long-term placements to short-term, and most recently they have chosen to provide emergency respite.
Veronica and David were approved in August and in September they fostered their first child. He was a 15-year-old asylum seeker who stayed with them until he was 18. They built a strong relationship with him and enjoyed providing care for him, teaching him how to be independent and prepared him for adulthood. He then moved into independent living when he turned 18.
After a year of fostering (2010), Veronica and David decided they would also like to provide respite care in their second spare bedroom for other foster children. They had built some strong relationships with other foster families in the area and wanted to help support them too. Their spare bedroom wasn’t being used, and their foster child had settled in so well, so they opened their home to more children on a temporary basis, providing respite for local families. Veronica and David took great pride in providing respite care for other children, and would often go above and beyond to ensure the child felt comfortable with them, and enjoyed their time there.
In 2011, Veronica and David decided they would use both bedrooms for long-term fostering. Their foster child was now 17, and they were missing the buzz of having younger children in the home. So Veronica and David continued their fostering journey with both of their spare bedrooms. Over their 16 years of fostering, Veronica and David have provided care for 35 children. Veronica and David’s impact on the children in their care is profound.
Veronica then fondly started to talk about all the children they have fostered, and speaks highly about one foster daughter who came to them when she was 14 years old. She stayed with Veronica and David until she was 20 before she moved closed to her home town. She now lives in the South and has started her own family with her long-term partner who is in the Army. She still maintains a close relationship with Veronica and David, and regularly comes to visit.
Have you faced many difficulties or challenges whilst fostering?
Veronica opens up about how sometimes fostering can be difficult and challenging, and spoke about a young person who stayed with them for 5 months who unfortunately couldn't adjust to the change, so sadly moved on to different carers. Veronica explained how this was a challenging time in their fostering journey, they really wanted to help this child and provide a safe home for him, he had a lot of trauma that he struggled with, and they couldn't keep him safe. So they had to make the hard decision to end their placement with him. They often think about him, and wonder how he is doing now.
Do you spend much time with other foster carers in the area?
Veronica and David's commitment extends beyond their own home. They are a strong pillar of support within the local fostering community, often providing respite and emergency care for other foster families. Veronica talks about how they provided regular respite for a young person, who ended up coming and staying with them short term due to the relationship they had made with Veronica and David. Veronica very proudly said "They asked to come and live with us, which we were more than happy to do" Veronica says “I always have an open door and the kettle on for anyone who needs it.”
Veronica spoke about how they attend all the local events hosted by Parallel Parents, which allows them to connect with other carers and their children and families. Veronica believes this is the best way to build relationships with not just other foster carers but also the children, as it gives the children a chance to get to know who they are, should they need to provide respite for them.
How has Veronica and David’s family taken to fostering?
Veronica and David’s immediate and extended family have fully embraced fostering, providing a supportive network for the children in their care.
Their adult children are significantly involved in the lives of the fostered children. This supportive environment extends to their young grandchildren, who enjoy meeting and playing with the children who stay with Veronica and David. Veronica and David have carefully explained to their younger grandchildren that fostering means providing a temporary, safe home for children who cannot currently live with their own families. This can be for a few days or for months and sometimes years.
Their granddaughters, in particular, have formed strong bonds, often coming over to play in the garden with the children staying with Veronica and David. They especially enjoy coming over to play with those who have regular respite stays. These visits have allowed the grandchildren to build positive connections, and often call the fostered children "their new friends."
What advice would you give to others who are considering fostering?
When asked for advice, Veronica says, “Fostering is not easy, but it is so rewarding. The difference you make to a young person’s life is the most amazing feeling.” She advises anyone considering fostering to be prepared for the challenges, as no children are the same, and sometimes can display unexpected behaviours, though this isn’t always in a negative way. Veronica also spoke about how crucial it is to have a good support network. She spoke about the support she has had from the Parallel Parents team and the vital connections you build with other foster carers on area fun days, meals out, and during training together. Veronica offers encouraging advice to anyone considering fostering: don't be discouraged by negative media reports. She notes that social media and newspapers are often quick to highlight negative experiences, despite the fact that there are "nine positives to every negative." She stresses that because every child entering care has experienced some form of trauma, it is essential for carers to stay educated and trained, as you never know when that knowledge will be critical.
Veronica then shared an example of how training and empathy can make a difference, recounting a short-term placement she had. The child was inquisitive about their next placement with two male carers, as the concept of two male parents was one they hadn't encountered before and they struggled to understand. Recognizing the need for gentle preparation, Veronica conducted research and sourced child-friendly books that normalised and explained the structure of a two-dad family. She provided these resources to the child, helping to ensure they felt prepared and comfortable for their move to their new home.
Thank you to Veronica and David for sharing their story with us. We are very grateful for their time, and are fascinated and inspired by their story!
There is a high demand for foster carers in the UK, as the number of local children coming into care continues to increase. If you have ever considered fostering or would like to learn more, please get in touch with Parallel Parents or visit our website. Whether you can offer a full-time home to a child or provide occasional respite and emergency fostering for just a few nights a year, your support can make a significant difference. We are here to provide you with all the information you need to take that first step toward changing a child's life.
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